I'm Fat Again

These past 2 days have been horrible. I've gained a lot because I've at a lot. Now I know that I should keep it around 200, no more than 400. And that's what I'll do for the remainder of the break.

I need this. I need Ana. She makes the sadness and the depression and the loneliness go away. When I'm focused on eating nothing and exercising and burning calories I don't have time to worry about my stupid relationship problems. Which are essentially nonexistent mind you. I must go back to that. And I will. Things were better when he was gone. Things will be better once I'm back on track. At least now I know what I must do.

So now I'm gonna work out, walk my dog, drink some hot chocolate and watch some 2012 Doomsday videos and call it a night. Then it's back to Ana in the morning. I will be 80 pounds.

-Cassie